Men's Ministry

[Full Quiver]

Let me preface this post by saying that of course myself and my team will follow the leading of the Lord as we direct the new Men's Ministry at Cedar Ridge.

The ministry is called ALTARED which is a play on the 2 words altar and altered thus implying changed at an altar or in prayer.

We are kicking this ministry off with a Spring retreat at Boxwell which is a 1500 acre boyscout campground. They have 70 buildings including a lodge, cabins, and kitchens.

My question is what would you guys look for in a men's ministry as far as monthly meetings. I don't want to Bible Study these guys to death but I don't want this to be a monthly get together to watch sports either. I need a balance of fun, worship, study, prayer, and fellowship.

Just looking for some insight from real folks in the flesh.

[RamboPreacher]

Not that you want to hear from this sinner, but since you asked...

As the leader of our local men's group we have found that a what works best for us is a devotional with some fellowship. A quick overview...

accountability will come with trust, and trust comes from fellowship and knowing that what is said in the meetings, stays there. So a typical meeting starts off with some fellowship and food. we cycle around the food and take turns, and sometimes everyone joins in with bringing something (that will have to be organized so that everyone doesn't bring the same thing). One time we had steaks and a grill out.

Once that is done, and in fact, I like to get started with the devotional and discussion while everyone still has a plate. It seems that the guys are mor comfortable that way, and by the time I am done with the "lecture" part, they are ready for discussion.

The discussions were really slow at first, but after a few months it got better, and took about a year and a half before everyone was comfortable participating. The hard part for me as the leader was to not try to fill in every moment. If they guys get used to me doing that, they they don't want to participate.

I won't get into details, you can figure that stuff out and what's best with your group. but I will say that most men (churchgoers), already have had their fill of the same "men-stuff" that is pushed/preached "at" them about men being logical and women being emotional; about men being fixers and women needing listeners; about men being susceptible to lust, internet porn etc... Most guys just want to know that they aren't alone in their struggles and being real with their friends and family.

In fact, the first devotional set I used, those few years ago was altered at the altar. devotions that were based on the time line of the various altars Abram/Abraham had erected in his life. the changes in his life what got him there, and what took him on - and making it relevant to today's man.

The balance will come. but again, that balance will be based on your group, not what someone else says should be for your group. discernment is a great thing to be praying for as leader, as you proceed.

Don't be afraid to be vulnerable yourself, if you want to have trust, you will need to exude trust yourself.

We started by meeting at church. in our case, that turned out to be a mistake. meeting at a home was much more comfortable and "warm"; it also lead to more balance in the small group and not just being another preaching session. There is a time for that.

our group started with an average of 2 men that would come consistently. sometimes it would be just me, and sometimes a couple others would show up. it was that way for just under a year. that probably won't happen to you, but once we started meeting at homes, it began to be more comfortable for the guys. and having the projection screen with sports or the plasma screen for during the fellowship time, doesn't hurt.

we now have about a dozen that attend faithfully and are working on growing, but the next step for our group is to get men to attend that don't attend our church. we have had some visitors to the men's group, but it is more difficult to get men to be committed to something like that. once we get a few more, we may split to a couple groups. Prayer works.

[kurt73]

As the Men's Group leader at my church we meet atleast once a month. This meeting is dinner, BBQ, breakfast, lunch, etc. with a short devotional. It really focus on fellowship, getting to know one another and building trust with one another.

We also have one event a month which involves, free car wash, racking the widows at the church leaves, free oil changes for the elders in the church, etc.

Our last meeting of the year is in Nov (since dec is so busy for everyone) and we cook breakfast or lunch for Ladies minstry and any other person that wants to come.

Starting in Jan. we will start the new year with a bible study on Witnessing (1 Thess.) If we want to grow as a church or a Men's group we need to share the gospel in the right way.

Just find out what your men have in common and shoot for that to get started.

[Full Quiver]

KEEP IT COMING GUYS

[kurt73]

I forgot, we call the group "The BOMB" Bomb meaning Body Of Men Believing. I even do a monthly newsletter called "The BOMB" and if you like a copy of it just PM me and I'll email a copy to you.

[RamboPreacher]

we also are skipping our monthly meeting in December, and will be having a Christmas party in January at a local bowling ally.

I had a very long conversation with Mark Menke about men's ministry when he came to our regional men's retreat a few years back.

in short, I was getting disappointed that there was no growth after half a year or so and that in fact, the initial enthusiasm was gone and there was fewer guys faithfully coming. I had a heart to heart with him and wanted to be sure if there was something I was doing wrong, and if someone else was better for the job, and I could just participate.

the bottom line is that what I was experiencing for the starting up of a men's ministry was pretty typical, as he had experienced and knew about from his position. He said that it can take a year or more, and though there are exceptions, a mens ministry starting from scratch will typically take over a year to get any kind of established foundation.

our group now has every active church attending man attend our meetings, at least once in a while, and most of them attend each month. we also have visitors nearly every month as they bring their friends. the younger guys are especially good at this.

[kurt73]

we also are skipping our monthly meeting in December, and will be having a Christmas party in January at a local bowling ally.

I had a very long conversation with Mark Menke about men's ministry when he came to our regional men's retreat a few years back.

in short, I was getting disappointed that there was no growth after half a year or so and that in fact, the initial enthusiasm was gone and there was fewer guys faithfully coming. I had a heart to heart with him and wanted to be sure if there was something I was doing wrong, and if someone else was better for the job, and I could just participate.

the bottom line is that what I was experiencing for the starting up of a men's ministry was pretty typical, as he had experienced and knew about from his position. He said that it can take a year or more, and though there are exceptions, a mens ministry starting from scratch will typically take over a year to get any kind of established foundation.

our group now has every active church attending man attend our meetings, at least once in a while, and most of them attend each month. we also have visitors nearly every month as they bring their friends. the younger guys are especially good at this.

very true, I have yet gotten all the men at the church to attend but I'm over 60%

Here is a very good website http://www.churchformen.com/ I have been at David Murrow conference/seminars and have walked away with very good tips on Men's group.

[RamboPreacher]

i also recommend "why men hate going to church". but I don't agree with all his conclusions or directions; he can be pretty "extreme" in his manliness approach. that doesn't mean there are a few babies in the bathwater (so to speak) that shouldn't be thrown out. there is much to glean from the book, and gives some interesting insight to the "womanization" of the church, as it is now (generally speaking).

and I think that this graphic is probably being generous to the men.

[Shellie]

I know it's not men's ministry, but why not start "men's ministry" a little younger. Imagine what kind of men we could "raise" if we started earlier.

In our state, we are having the first ever "BLUE", Boys Living the Ultimate Experience conference for boys ages 14-18. The entire weekend is focused on ministering to this age and gender.

Likewise....last year we had our first ever "PINK", Princesses in need of a King. Girls ages 14-18. We will have our second one this year.

Anyway, I know it's not exactly what you guys were talking about, but I thought you would enjoy hearing about it.

[RamboPreacher]

our men's ministry starts at youth group level. we don't want younger than that necessarily because we talk about things that they wouldn't understand. With that sad, we do have a boys group that is also run out of our Children's ministry that mentors some of the younger guys too.

[kurt73]

I know it's not men's ministry, but why not start "men's ministry" a little younger. Imagine what kind of men we could "raise" if we started earlier.

In our state, we are having the first ever "BLUE", Boys Living the Ultimate Experience conference for boys ages 14-18. The entire weekend is focused on ministering to this age and gender.

Likewise....last year we had our first ever "PINK", Princesses in need of a King. Girls ages 14-18. We will have our second one this year.

Anyway, I know it's not exactly what you guys were talking about, but I thought you would enjoy hearing about it.

Those are very good ideas.

[Full Quiver]

Previously there was a men's ministry at our church that just fizzled out. The leader was wanting some one to step up and feel the void. he's not really a front man. He is my assistant though and has great passion for this ministry.

With all that said there is an established base that is desiring the renewing of this ministry. Also several new guys and guys that did not participate in the original group are showing much interest in the new ministry. That's great news!

[wsmitty]

Kurt,

I like that, "The BOMB". I really like that. Is it alright if we use that for our church? I would also love to see your newsletter.

I am enjoying everyone's ideas. We have very few men in our church. Out of our 40-50 I think I can almost count the men with both hands and that is it.

We definitely need a mens group started in our church. Keep the suggestions coming

I forgot, we call the group "The BOMB" Bomb meaning Body Of Men Believing. I even do a monthly newsletter called "The BOMB" and if you like a copy of it just PM me and I'll email a copy to you.

[kurt73]

Kurt,

I like that, "The BOMB". I really like that. Is it alright if we use that for our church? I would also love to see your newsletter.

I am enjoying everyone's ideas. We have very few men in our church. Out of our 40-50 I think I can almost count the men with both hands and that is it.

We definitely need a mens group started in our church. Keep the suggestions coming

I forgot, we call the group "The BOMB" Bomb meaning Body Of Men Believing. I even do a monthly newsletter called "The BOMB" and if you like a copy of it just PM me and I'll email a copy to you.

sure you can use it, also shoot me your email and I'll send the newsletter to you. It is in Micro$oft Publishing format.

[RamboPreacher]

we just call our group the men's group. but what we are known for is that our monthly meetings are held in "The Men's Room". one of the guys in the group is pretty centrally located and believes that it is his ministry to provide a place to meet. he remodeled his basement before becoming part of the group and it is perfect for the group!

Recently, though we have had to bring in more chairs (for the devotion/teaching part), as we have been growing one or two at a time, the last few months! woohoo!!