Jude 2

An oldie but a goodie. And it goes a little something like this -- and a one, two, three, four ...

You can't get to Heaven on roller skates,
You'll roll right by them pearly gates.

You can't get to Heaven on a rocking chair,
'Cause the Lord don't want no lazybones there.

You can't get to Heaven in a limousine,
'Cause the Lord don't sell no gasoline.

If you get to Heaven before I do,
Just drill a hole and pull me through.

If I get to Heaven before you do,
I'll plug that hole with shavings and glue.

You can't get to Heaven with powder and paint,
It makes you look like what you ain't.

You can't chew tobaccy on that golden shore,
'Cause the Lord don't have no cuspidor.

"That's all there is, there ain't no more,"
Saint Peter said as he closed the door.

There's one thing more I forgot to tell,
If you don't go to Heaven, you'll go to Hell.

...

I feel a shout a comin' on!!!!


Another oldie but goodie.................

Let the church roll on (oh my lord)
Let the church roll on (oh my lord)
Let the church roll on (oh my lord)
Let the church roll on

There's a deacon in the church (oh my lord)
And he won't do right (oh my lord)
What shall we do (oh my lord)
Turn him out and kick him out
And let the church roll on

There a drunkards in the church (oh my lord)
And he won't do right (oh my lord)
What shall we do, take the liquor pour it out
And let the church roll on


There's women in the church (oh my lord)
Got paint on their face (oh my lord)
What shall we do take some water and wash it off
And let the church roll on

[quote="Poimen"]An oldie but a goodie. And it goes a little something like this -- and a one, two, three, four ...

You can't get to Heaven on roller skates,
You'll roll right by them pearly gates.

You can't get to Heaven on a rocking chair,
'Cause the Lord don't want no lazybones there.

You can't get to Heaven in a limousine,
'Cause the Lord don't sell no gasoline.

If you get to Heaven before I do,
Just drill a hole and pull me through.

If I get to Heaven before you do,
I'll plug that hole with shavings and glue.

You can't get to Heaven with powder and paint,
It makes you look like what you ain't.

You can't chew tobaccy on that golden shore,
'Cause the Lord don't have no cuspidor.

"That's all there is, there ain't no more,"
Saint Peter said as he closed the door.

There's one thing more I forgot to tell,
If you don't go to Heaven, you'll go to Hell.

...

We also had..
Oh you can't get to heaven in a mini skirt
Cuz the Lord don't want those boys to flirt

Might as well make a Medley out it.

WHY DO YOU BOB YOUR HAIR GIRLS
Why do you bob your hair, girls?
You're doin' a mighty wrong.
The Bible says don't cut it;
It says to wear it long.
Don't ever bob your hair, girls,
For it's an awful sin.
Without your crown of glory
You shall not enter in.

IF YOUR HAIR'S TOO LONG THERE'S SIN IN YOUR HEART
A rich young ruler came one day,
To ask about the narrow way.
But his hair was long (but his hair was long)
And he couldn't be saved (no, he couldn't be saved).
The preacher looked at him through tears,
And he said, "Your problem's on your ears."
If your hair's too long (if your hair's too long),
There's sin in your heart (there's sin in your heart).

If your hair's on your ears (if your hair's on your ears),
There's sin in you heart (there's sin in your heart),
Get it cut today (get it cut today),
And make a new start (a happy glad start, O Lord).
You'll live a life of fear a dread,
With a tangled mess upon your head.
If your hair's too long (if your hair's too long),
There's sin in your heart (there's sin in your heart).

And yet another one:

This doggone world we're living in
It's giving me a fit
It seems like everywhere I turn
I see a hypocrite

Well, if ya wanna go to heaven
Well, you can't live like that
So let me tell you, brother
God's a-gonna get 'cha for that

God's gonna get 'cha for that, yeah
God's gonna get 'cha for that
There's no place to run and hide
For He knows where you're at

God's gonna get 'cha for that, yeah
God's gonna get 'cha for that
Every wrong thing that you do
God's gonna get you for that

Now, the preacher in our church
He's a mighty devoted man
Everybody thinks, that he's a-goin' to the Promised Land

But the other night on a country road
While I was a-drivin' through
I caught the preacher makin' love
To Sister, Mary Lou

God's gonna get 'cha for that, yeah
God's gonna get 'cha for that
There's no place to run an' hide
For He knows where you're at

God's gonna get 'cha for that, yeah
God's gonna get 'cha for that
Every wrong thing that you do
God's gonna get 'cha for that

Now oh Sister Bessie, she like to testify
She says, 'I'll always love the Lord, someday I'm a-gonna fly
But the other night while goin' by the local liquor store
I caught oh Sister Bessie, flyin' out the door

God's gonna get 'cha for that
God's gonna get 'cha for that
There's no place to run and hid
For He knows where you're at

Simply to share some songs of nostalgic value, and not to demean those who held this belief, but it kinda fits in with the time frame and culture of when these songs came about...

I used to sing it reg'lar, and was taught it by my Maw Maw Flippo, so the song is actually dear to me.


Good Ole Bible Lines

In 1 John 1 and 7 we're walking in the light
Amongst the formal churches, The Church of God is right
In Act 20 and 28 I have my vision clear
The Church of God is the Bible church and I'm contented here

Good ole Bible lines
Good ole Bible lines
I've got my ticket purchased on these good ole Bible lines
Stop overs there not granted
She runs on scheduled time
And I'm on my way to heaven on these good ole Bible lines
...



There are at least two more verses, but I'll stop there.

Anybody besides me (and Mike) ever heard it?

I havent heard of any of these songs before... some are actually kind of funny.

We also had..
Oh you can't get to heaven in a mini skirt
Cuz the Lord don't want those boys to flirt

I remember singing that in gleaners. In fact, we had a rousing chorus of it going down the road the other day.

I remember someone sang a special song in the Kelso, WA COGOP once...

...it was "God's Gonna Cut You Down."

We was fixin to bomb Germany a bit more in my gleaner class!

scooter wrote:We was fixin to bomb Germany a bit more in my gleaner class!

I'm too young to march in the infantry,
shoot the artillery,
ride in the cavalry,
I'm too young to fly over Germany,
but I'm on the lords army!!

(or similar)


We'd of updated the song in 68 but nothing rhymed so well with Nam.

Gerald Creasy wrote:

scooter wrote:We was fixin to bomb Germany a bit more in my gleaner class!

I'm too young to march in the infantry,
shoot the artillery,
ride in the cavalry,
I'm too young to fly over Germany,
but I'm on the lords army!!

(or similar)


We'd of updated the song in 68 but nothing rhymed so well with Nam.

Response: Funny you could sing that now and just replace young with old.

Gerald Creasy wrote:I'm too young to march in the infantry,
shoot the artillery,
ride in the cavalry,
I'm too young to fly over Germany,
but I'm on the lords army!!

We'd of updated the song in 68 but nothing rhymed so well with Nam.

Finally recognized one from my early baptist days. Although we didnt isolate a country to fly over.

"I'm to youg to fly over land and sea"

wow that's still different from what I've heard it (didn't grow up with it, but have heard it in churches in the last 10-15 years)

"I may never march in the infantry
Ride in the calvary, shoot the artillery
I may never fly over the enemy,
but I'm in the Lords Army"

Pastor Bill wrote:.....Ride in the calvary.....

CaVALry

CAVALRY!!!!!