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If the Chilean miners were COGOP members...

Posted: October 14th, 2010, 7:59 am
by captaindw
They would have not been rescued in time because it would have to be discussed at the next International Assembly first.

We would have called them 32 miners and one from the "concerned"

Instead of sending down Elvis Presley songs we would have sent classics such as "Great Speckled Bird"

The order in which they were rescued would be tithers and finance committee members first, preacher's kids last.

They would have not been rescued in time because the money to do so would have to go thru IO first, delaying the process by six months.

Instead of the Chilean flag being displayed we would have used our church flag, but a debate would have ensued by people outside because some wanted to use the COGOP logo instead.

They would have not been rescued in time because the money to do so would have to be requested from local churches first in our October and March missions drives.

Some would not have been rescued because their local membership has not been determined and records have been lost.

The drill location for the rescue tunnel would not have been selected in time until after ARK was hired to select the location and estimate the cost.

At the end of the rescue mission we would celebrate with a "all nations" march with the Bahamas Brass Band playing.

Nobody would know about the successful rescue until it would be published in the White Wing Messenger months later.


:D :D :D

Or

Posted: October 14th, 2010, 8:05 am
by scooter
They would have been rescued by their pastors, if they were tithers. :lol: 8)

Posted: October 15th, 2010, 10:55 am
by Mountie12
At least one of the 32 would be the pastor. He would be the last one out because he would have to make sure the toilets had been flushed, no water was left running, all the un-used bulletins and trash left on the pews was picked up, the thermostat adjusted properly and all the lights turned off.

Upon reaching the top he would be welcomed by his overseer who would engage in a 2 hour sermon telling him how the company had been a mother to him and even though the company was at fault for allowing conditions to exist that entrapped him for 69 days, the company is still the most glorious thing in the world and he should count it a priviledge to be a member of the company.

After that, his overseer would demand to know why he had not reported and paid tithes for 69 days. :lol: :twisted:

Posted: October 15th, 2010, 3:27 pm
by KBevangelist
That is just too funny. Mountie that was icing on the cake!

KB