I give up on understanding

Penny · Postby **Penny** » July 8th, 2008, 2:26 pm

You know, I get so mad at times....I give up on even trying to understand anything.

My Daughter is at camp.

Today when my husband came home, Have you called Lindsey?
I said no, why would I?

You need to call and check on her.

I told him she most likey would not have her cell phone on, and I know she is not carrying it.

Man oh man.... You would never ever guess how mad that made him. Even I was shocked, I really should not be shocked by now at the things that would set him off.

How dare them not allow her to have her cell phone on, I told him that was camp rules. He ask was the adults allow to have there phones, I told him I honesty did not know.

That went in to round 2 Well you know they are if they have them why can't the kids have theirs? That is un fair.. blah blah blah----- and it went on.

When he got done. I told him Lindsey is 15 she dose not need me checking on her at CHURCH CAMP. If I did not feel she was ok there I would have never left her. And If She needed to call home she would.
So stop acting like a child. I told him he gets mad over the dumest things.

gosh.. I give up Going back to crying now

Ilovebigcats · Postby **Ilovebigcats** » July 8th, 2008, 2:36 pm

You should have stopped it from the get go and said... have YOU called Lindsay? If you are worried then you should call her.

Why do some men think we should do everything?? Grrrrrrrrrrr....

Penny · Postby **Penny** » July 8th, 2008, 2:39 pm

thank you

THAT IS an great idea

I know he will do this again before this week is out..
I will do that...

I do not know how it is in your hosue But in mine I do everything....it my job as a wife to do everything.

I wish he would just relize I cannot handle much more.

DaJudge · Postby **DaJudge** » July 8th, 2008, 2:55 pm

(Ducking and running for cover before one of these ladies sees me in this thread) :lol:

RamboPreacher · Postby **RamboPreacher** » July 8th, 2008, 3:06 pm

at our camps, we don't allow the kids to have cell phones, or ipods, etc. if there is an emergency, all the workers and volunteers have them.

and I agree with the catz, if it is such a big deal, then maybe he should have called her. it is apparent that you have at leas some trust with the camp, and it's workers, that it didn't cross your mind to do that kind of checking (not saying you didn't miss her, though - i still miss my daughter not being around, and she is married and I have two grandkids)

Penny · Postby **Penny** » July 8th, 2008, 3:34 pm

I miss her, But I know she having a great time.. (I hope)

She a camper this week. Next week she an cabin asst.

I cannot deal with 2 weeks of hubby acting worse than my 2 teens

free · Postby **free** » July 8th, 2008, 3:48 pm

Does your husband go to church? Is he a Christian? If he attends church with you perhaps your pastor or another trusted male could speak to him...Maybe some Christian counseling would help as well.

Penny · Postby **Penny** » July 8th, 2008, 4:04 pm

Does your husband go to church?

NO

Is he a Christian?

NO

If he attends church with you perhaps your pastor or another trusted male could speak to him

He comes to church with me maybe 2 times a year. My pastor is working this camp.

And he grew up going to COGOP camps...

...Maybe some Christian counseling would help as well.

It would.. But he would never go for that. I need that at times just to deal with him.

KBevangelist · Postby **KBevangelist** » July 8th, 2008, 4:37 pm

Penny wrote:I miss her, But I know she having a great time.. (I hope)

She a camper this week. Next week she an cabin asst.

I cannot deal with 2 weeks of hubby acting worse than my 2 teens

She is fine and was in the altar praying tonight.

KB

Linda · Postby **Linda** » July 8th, 2008, 6:30 pm

Penny, you will find that as your daughter gets older your husband will become more protective. I remember when our 2 daughters became teenagers, it was like my hubby's personality changed. If they went out on dates he would always make sure they had money to call home if they needed to. He never trusted any of the young men because, I quote, "I was a young man once and I know what they want"! :roll:

Your hubby has realized that Lindsay is not his baby daughter anymore, but a beautiful young lady. Plus, he probably remembers how he flirted with the girls at youth camp himself.

Fathers have a hard time dealing with daughters growing up sometimes.

We'll pray that he can be at peace knowing that she is safe.

Penny · Postby **Penny** » July 9th, 2008, 1:02 am

KB_ thanks For the note, I know she fine

Penny, you will find that as your daughter gets older your husband will become more protective.

thanks for the warning..

Dr. Ron · Postby **Dr. Ron** » July 9th, 2008, 5:44 am

Penny,.

All the advice you have gotten is worthy of note.

Now, this is the way I would handle this issue.

1. Before Lindsey goes anywhere else, make sure you have two (per week) times set for her to call home. The camp officials will agree to this if the parents request it. If they won't agree, then don't let her go.

2. Make certain the times you have set up are times when both you and your husband are there. Both can talk to her and find out how she is.
Since your husband is not a christian, he is looking for all the reasons why he should not trust those "christian men or boys". You must take all those options from him but in a very structured way.

3. If I were your husband, I would most likely be just like him.
So, don't let this become an issue for you. Call the camp administratior, explain the situation, and I would certainly expect them to accomodate you.

4. It's easier to show love and understanding and "difuse" any potential ugly situation, than to try to argue it out. It seems that this is the only way you have to settle issues. Arguing is not the answer.

KBevangelist · Postby **KBevangelist** » July 9th, 2008, 5:46 am

Penny,

She pretty much can call anytime.

If need be she can use my cell phone

if you want I will PM it to you

KB

Penny · Postby **Penny** » July 9th, 2008, 7:54 am

Dr Ron

She will be at camp again next week as an asst cabin leader, I will make sure she has a time to call home, And will talk to the director at that camp, when I drop her off on Sunday,

I know he looking to find things that are wrong, he dose that all the time, even the few times he comes to church with us, he will FIND ONE THING wrong with what is going on. I do try hard not to let all these things bug me, but at times, it just hard.

Kb- sent you a pm

pitts47150 · Postby **pitts47150** » July 9th, 2008, 12:21 pm

Penny, I can relate to your problems here, with hubby not in church. I do agree with Dr Ron. The devil loves it when you argue. My husband use to argue with me sometimes but when I'm upset I go speechless. I figure if O argue back that is what the devil want and I don't want to do anything to please any of those evil beings. I don't talk, I just let him cool off and pray to the Lord please Lord take care of this problem. I've had some real bad things that went on in my life but I've learned how to trust in God and Let God take care of me. Things have got alot better but he still don't go to church, but he will not ever stop me from going myself. He knows that God is Great and you don't mess around with HIm. I know i don't get on here much but just wanted to let you know I know what you are going thru. If you ever need someone to talk to please don't hestate to pm me. I give God all the praise and glory for what he has already don't in my life and my husband's life. He has changed alot and praise God he WILL BE SAVED. Thanks for listening

Jude 2