I'm not excusing anyone, whether it is an "emotional" affair or more; but, there is a big difference. Stopping short of an affair to get help and counseling is admirable and acknowledges one's dependence on God and the accountability and support of the family of God.
A female pastor in a church we attended was developing a close relationship with a board member; they were working too closely together on a project and she was working too many hours overall. (The senior pastor was a slavedriver... Sam and I were interns at the time and newlyweds, and we ended up dropping out of the program.) This female pastor brought it to the attention of the senior pastor, who laughed it off and basically ignored the problem. The problem led to an inappropriate kiss, which caused a scandal; and the pastor and her husband, who was also a pastor on staff, were asked to leave the church. The board member, however, retained his position, (which seemed somewhat unfair to me). But, when the female pastor had sought help, she received none, and I wondered if the whole mess could have been avoided if appropriate safeguards had been put in place to begin with.
dolfan wrote:This is an interesting case study if nothing else. When does "unhealthy relationship" become "sexual immorality" in light of Jesus' admonition that whosever lusts after another woman commits adultery with her in his heart?? I'm not accusing the Fresh Fire people of two-stepping around that, here; they're probably trying to cope with an ugly mess in a pretty way and it just can't be done. I don't envy them. But, they are the ones who stated that there was no "sexual immorality" (their phrase) by either Mr. or Mrs. Bentley that lead up to their separation. I'm just curious on your thoughts.
Initially when the separation was announced, it sounded as though it was Fresh Fire's understanding that there was no immorality involved.. it sounds to me as though more information had been learned about details of the separation since then.